2 Voices

I regularly reference my “ego” and my “True Self” in pieces. So, I figured it’d be useful to clarify the difference.

I experience them both on a daily basis as 2 distinct voices in my head.

I wouldn’t call it an “Angel vs Devil” situation. That dualism is a bit too simplistic to capture what’s happening. My ego often makes good points. My ego is intelligent & capable. My ego isn’t inherently evil. It just has a different priority structure where “me” exists at the top, above all others.

I also wouldn’t classify it as a battle. I experience it more like a Big Brother / Little Brother dynamic.

My True Self is the Big Brother who exudes calm confidence. He’s soft-spoken, but can be stern & direct. He knows what he wants. He knows where he’s going. And he doesn’t need the attention that Little Brother so desperately craves.

Little Brother (ego) is often temperamental.

• He derives his self-worth from the world around him. He understands himself through the eyes of others. He has an external locus of control.

• He’s self-protective. He puts on armor to avoid getting hurt. He makes it a priority to protect himself, even at the expense of others.

• He’s self-promotional. He wants to be recognized for his efforts and praised for his contributions, driven by the insecurity that he’ll be excluded if he’s “not good enough.”

Can you picture a little bro trying so hard to impress Mom & Dad?

Meanwhile, my True Self knows his inherent Wholeness. So, he doesn’t feel the need to prove anything to anyone else. He remains steady, unbothered by the opinions of others and shifts in the environment. He’s a leader of The Internal Locus of Control Association.

So, it doesn’t become a power struggle. As my ego does whatever it takes to protect himself & prove his worth, my True Self will wait patiently for the opportunity to do what’s honest.

When I recognize that my ego’s been running the Country of Trent with no semblance of checks & balances, then I try to quiet my mind and hear the patient voice of my True Self. When asked, my True Self will always offer a clear & sage directive. I just have to turn down the volume of my ego and listen.

Then, once I hear, I can still use my ego. The Big Brother & Little Brother don’t have to be at odds with each other. The Big Bro just had to calm down the rambunctious Little Guy to get him on his side. Then, they become a team. And when they’re on the same side… they’re unstoppable.

A few other signals of how I can tell which party is running the Country of Trent:

Ego

• Greedy

• Complain-y

• Fearful

• Controlling (of the future or other people)

• Arrogant

True Self

• Grateful: “I’ve got it all already. Everything else is just bonus.”

• Creative

• Genuine desire to give, without expectation

• Compassion for other people

• Willing to do hard things to overcome fear & grow

• Willing to do what’s honest (True Self… get it?)

• Trusting of the Universe and other people

• Being kind to my body & soul

• Basically, anything that’s aligned with my natural instincts