How hard do I want to happy?

Pulled from the Archives - originally written 6/10/23

The question is not “What can I do to make myself happy?”

The question is “What can I do to make it easier to remind myself that ‘happiness is always one thought away’?” (as Uncle Leo would say)

There’s nothing I need to do, there’s nothing I can do, to make myself happy.

However, there are actions I can take, thoughts I can surface, to remind myself that happiness is always within my reach, even if it’s not currently within my grasp.

This morning I woke up after a long night out. My mind tempted to go to a place of self-ridicule:

• “Why did I stay out until 3am?”

• “Why was the McDonalds stop on the way home necessary? We already had Wolfnights gourmet wraps in hand…”

• “Imagine how much happier I’d be right now if I didn’t have that extra drink. I’m an idiot.”

Negotiating my happiness on the basis of past actions

Telling myself that there’s a state where I could be happier, that I would be happier, if only I hadn’t _____.

Amidst the temptation, amidst the spiral, I stopped. I stopped. And remembered:

I could choose to be happy

All on my own

Right now

Nobody was stopping me

Except for me

After a full week of living from inspiration,

After an incredible day of deep connection with my girlfriend,

After a night filled with unforgettable memories with friends,

I could choose to focus on those things

I could choose to be happy right now

All I needed was a brief reminder that I owned that choice

The concept of Be-Have-Do came to my mind

Nothing that I do can make me happy or unhappy

I layer on that meaning

That’s my perception to own

So when it comes to my actions, they do not dictate my happiness

However, I do believe some of my actions make it easier for me to remember my choice

While others make the choice feel harder, more distant

Yet the choice itself is always “one thought away”

So when it comes to my actions, my habits & routines, it’s just a consideration of how easy I want to make it to remind myself to be happy

For me, right now, that looks like:

• Movement

• Getting out in nature

• Meditating

• Talking to loved ones

As I move through any part of my day, I can ask myself the question:

Does this action make the choice feel closer or further away?

How hard do I want to happy?