Pre-Com

I learned many important lessons in high school, but one in particular always stuck with me:

Maybe it was the shock of hearing my health teacher / football coach say “pre-c*m” in the classroom, but I’ve never forgotten that warning.

(I guess that’s “Mission Accomplished” for the public education system!)

Similar to how pre-c*m can still get you pregnant, premature commitment (pre-com) can get you tied up in plans that you don’t actually want to do.

“Let’s grab dinner sometime!”

“Yeah that sounds great”

(Truthfully have no intention of “doing dinner” with this person)

~2 weeks later~

“How about Friday?”

(Sh*t.)

I’ve come to realize the importance of honestly wielding my word. I’m so resistant to letting other people down in the moment, that I avoid having the hard conversation upfront. Rather than hitting them with the initial dose of “no”, I rely on the rescheduling war of attrition.

“This week is busy with work… oh and I’m traveling next week… but let me know some times next month.”

Once next month rolls around, I go with the new excuse of “I’ve got family in town.”

Why not save myself the effort and spare them the confusion?

Why not just say how I feel upfront, rather than prolonging the heartache and offering false hope?

Trust myself to commit to things when I actually want to do them. And resist the temptation to opt-in to “maybe” plans that only serve to be a Future Self burden.

Otherwise, too much pre-com and I’ll impregnate my schedule with bastardized plans for the next 9 months.